经典科幻文学:《银河系漫游指南》第32章5

Ford shouted out, "Hey listen! I think we've got enough problems on our own having you shooting at us, so if you could avoid laying your problems on us as well, I think we'd all find it easier to cope!"
Another pause, and then the loud hailer again.
"Now see here, guy," said the voice on the loud hailer, "you're not dealing with any dumb two-bit trigger-pumping morons with low hairlines, little piggy eyes and no conversation, we're a couple of intelligent caring guys that you'd probably quite like if you met us socially! I don't go around gratuitously shooting people and then bragging about it afterwards in seedy space-rangers bars, like some cops I could mention! I go around shooting people gratuitously and then I agonize about it afterwards for hours to my girlfriend!"
"And I write novels!" chimed in the other cop. "Though I haven't had any of them published yet, so I better warn you, I'm in a meeeean mood!"
Ford's eyes popped halfway out of their sockets. "Who are these guys?" he said.
"Dunno," said Zaphod, "I think I preferred it when they were shooting."
"So are you going to come quietly," shouted one of the cops again, "or are you going to let us blast you out?"
"Which would you prefer?" shouted Ford.

于是福特喊道：“嘿，听着！由于你们的火力，我们自己的问题已经够多了，所以如果你们别再把你们自己的问题强加在我们头上的话，我想我们大家都会发现问题要容易解决得多。”
又是一阵沉默，随后手提式扩音器的声音再次响起。
“喂，伙计们。”这声音说，“你们面对的并不是头发搭在额头上、长着小小的猪眼睛、毫无交流能力的随便什么蠢货，我们是两个高智商的人，心思缜密。如果在日常交际中碰见我们的话，你们可能会相当喜欢我们！我可不是跑来毫无理由的朝人开枪、事后再拿到星际巡逻队员们的破烂酒吧炫耀的那种人，警察里有这种人，我可以举出好几个例子来！我属于那种跑来毫无理由的朝人开枪，事后会在女朋友面前痛苦整整几个小时的人！”
“另外我还写小说！”另一个警察配合得相当默契，“虽然到目前为止一本也没有出版过，所以我最好还是先警告你们，我现在的心情很糟糕！”
福特把眼睛从避难窝里露出一半。“这两个家伙是谁？”他说。
“我哪儿知道，”赞福德说，“我倒情愿他们继续开枪。”
“那么，你们是打算自己乖乖出来呢，”其中一个警察又喊道，“还是由我们把你们给炸出来？”
“你们自己喜欢哪种呢？”福特吼了一声。