露西回答MBA学员的问题 Lucy Kellaway tackles MBA students' dilemmas

As a female MBA student, I get a strong sense that some male classmates presume I have benefited from unofficial positive discrimination and do not deserve to be there as much as them. This is untrue and irritating, but should I tackle it head-on and challenge them or rise above such pathetic views?

作为一名女性MBA学员，我有种强烈的感觉，同班的一些男同学认为我受益于非正式的“特殊优待”，不如他们有资格在这里学习。他们的这种想法不仅不对，而且令人愤怒，但我是应该单刀直入地处理这件事，直接质问他们，还是无视这种牵强的看法？

There are two different things here. The first is whether you have benefited from unofficial positive discrimination. As most schools are ashamed of how rotten they are at attracting women, it is possible that you did. The other question is whether you deserve your place. Just because you may have benefited from discrimination does not mean you don’t deserve to be there. Throughout my career I have benefited from being female — I have been given opportunities and pushed forward and allowed to be different. At the same time, I think I deserve the breaks I’ve been given, so I don’t feel in the least sheepish about it. Make the most of it and take the opportunities. Women spend too much time trying to prove that they deserve the positions they have been given. I suggest you copy your male colleagues and act entitled. If you do it convincingly enough, they may well end up thinking you are entitled to everything you’ve got.

有两个不同的问题。第一是你是否受益于非正式的“特殊优待”，大多数商校都因为在吸引女性学员方面的糟糕表现而感到惭愧，因此有可能你的确从中受益。另一个问题是，你是否够格被录取。你或许从这种“特殊优待”中受了益，但仅凭这一点并不能说你就不够格在这里学习。在我的整个职业生涯中，我的女性身份一直让我受益——我得到了机会，受到了重用，可以与众不同。同时，我也认为给予我的机遇是我应得的，因此我没有任何难为情的感觉。充分利用，把握机会。女性花了太多时间试图证明自己获得的位置是她们够格获得的。我建议你效仿你的男同学，表现得理直气壮一些。如果你的表现足够令人信服，最终他们很有可能认为你的所有成就都是理所应当的。

I have a PhD in physics and decided to study for an MBA to help turn my specialist knowledge into a career in business. I find that some of the people teaching courses are less qualified than me and I feel short-changed. Is it unreasonable to demand that I am taught by more highly qualified academics for the rest of the course?

我拥有物理学博士学位，决定攻读MBA是为了结合我的本专业知识，在商界开创一番事业。我发现有些课程的任课教师水平还不如我，我感觉自己亏了。要求更称职的老师来教授我剩余的课程是否不合理呢？

So how do you see that working? You march up to the dean and point out that as you have a PhD in physics you need to be taught by smarter people than the other students, who are less brainy and will be fine with mediocre teaching? I guarantee your dean will send you away with a flea in your ear and you will get a reputation for being stuck-up, humourless and insufferable. You are not learning physics now. This is business, and one of the most important things you must grasp is how to work in teams and to pretend to show respect for people you don’t actually respect at all.

你打算怎么把这事儿办成呢？走到院长面前，说你有物理学博士学位，教你的老师需要比其他学生的更聪明，因为他们没你那么聪明，只需要一般的老师教就行了——是这样吗？我敢保证，你的院长会把你讥讽走，你会得到自命不凡、一本正经和讨人厌的名声。你现在不是在学习物理学。这是商学院，你必须学会的最重要的事情之一就是如何在团队中工作，并且假装尊敬你实际上丝毫不尊敬的人。

I work at least as hard as my classmates, but more efficiently than some. I have other commitments and try to keep weekends free as far as possible, and do not want them consumed by panicky emails from group project colleagues — which infuriates them. How can I convince them I am pulling my weight?

我至少和别的同学一样努力，还比一些同学更有效率。我还有其他的一些事情要做，我试着尽可能地把周末空出来，不想把周末耗费在小组项目的其他同学发来的惊慌失措的邮件上——而这让他们大为光火。我该如何让他们相信我没有偷懒？

You have three options. Number one is to spoil your weekends, which you have already said you don’t want to do. Number two is to tell them point blank you don’t work on weekends. Finish your bit by Friday night and leave the rest to them. The trouble with this ploy is that the others will not like you much and they will end up making final decisions on projects on Sunday nights without you. The third option is to take control of the project so that it has to be done on your terms. Everyone else would surely rather not have to work on weekends either, but are too inefficient to manage it. If you show them the way, you will almost certainly end up doing more than your fair share of the work, but you will be earning their gratitude — as well as teaching them the important life lesson that weekends aren’t for working.

你有3个选择。第一个是毁掉你的周末，你已经说过你不想这样做。第二个是直截了当地告诉他们你周末不工作。在周五晚上就把你的部分做完，然后把其他的工作留给他们。这种策略的问题在于其他人不会太喜欢你，他们会在周日晚上没有你的情况下做出项目的重大决定。第三个选择是取得项目的控制权，让项目根据你的安排进行。其他人肯定也宁愿不在周末工作，但他们效率太低，无法做到这一点。如果你教他们该怎么做，最后你所做的工作几乎必然会超过你本应承担的部分，但你会赢得他们的感激，你还将教会他们人生中的重要一课——周末不是用来工作的。

My partner wants to do an MBA abroad. I realise this may mean a significant salary rise in the long term, but there is a cost, too. Together with our children, I would move with him for the duration and would have to give up my job. Is he being unfair? What do you think would be fair quid pro quo?

我的伴侣想要到国外攻读MBA。我认识到长远来看这意味着薪水的显著提升，但这样做也是有成本的。在他求学期间我和孩子们也要一起搬过去，我不得不放弃我的工作。他这样做是否对我不公平？你认为怎么做才是公平的呢？

What he is asking you to do is huge. To relocate everyone and to lose your job and have to find schools for your children and a new job for yourself — only to have to do it all over again at the end of two years? How do you feel about the country he is dragging you off to? How important and enjoyable is the job he is making you leave? How certain is he that the MBA will transform his career and earning prospects? It sounds as if he is being utterly unfair. Can’t he do an online course or a local one instead?

他要求你做出的牺牲是巨大的。要举家搬迁，你会失去你的工作，既要给你们的孩子们找到新学校，还得给你自己找份新工作——而且在两年的课程结束后还得全部再来一遍？你喜欢他要把你拖过去的那个国家吗？他让你放弃的工作有多重要和有趣？他对MBA能改变自己职业前途和收入前景的信心有多大？听起来好像他的要求对你挺不公平的。他就不能选择网络课程或者在当地求学吗？

There are too many students on my MBA with poor English and not enough work experience to fully understand the programme. I fear this is affecting my education. What can I do? Can I legitimately ask for a rebate?

我攻读MBA的班级里有太多学员英语不好，工作经验也不够，以至于无法充分理解项目。我担心这会影响我的MBA教育。我能做什么？我能合理地要求退款吗？

You can try. I would love to hear how you get on. I don’t believe for a moment that you will have any luck. Neither do I believe that it is affecting your education too badly. Can’t you just enjoy being a star on the course? And isn’t one of the points of an MBA the contacts that you make? If you befriend these people from all over the world you will have an international network that will surely stand you in good stead with whatever you go on to do.

你可以试试。我很想听听后面的进展。我根本不相信你会成功拿回退款，我也不认为这对你的教育会有太严重的影响。你就不能享受当“尖子生”的感觉吗？结识人难道不是MBA课程的意义之一吗？如果你和这些来自世界各地的学员成为朋友，你会获得国际人脉网，无论你今后将要做什么，这对你必然都是有帮助的。

I’m still unemployed 18 months after graduating from my MBA. I keep hearing that I am overqualified but I don’t get offers for more senior roles either. The school’s career service doesn’t seem able to help. I’m considering further education but would that simply make it worse?

MBA毕业18个月后，我依然没找到工作。雇主老是说这职位让我来做就屈才了，但我也没有拿到更高级的职位。学校的就业指导中心似乎也帮不上什么忙。我在考虑进一步深造，但会不会适得其反呢？

No, do not dream of signing up for yet another degree. That will cost you more money and make the situation worse. Instead you need to understand why you aren’t getting the jobs. Are you applying to a sector that is too competitive? Is there something off-putting about your CV? Are you getting interviews and the process goes awry at that stage? There must be someone at the career service who can answer a few basic questions. Show your CV to a sensible person. Work out what the gaps are. Broaden your net. Try different things. And, hardest thing of all, try not to get too discouraged.

是的，不要幻想着再读一个学位。这会花掉你更多的钱，让情况变得更糟。相反，你需要搞清楚为何你没能找到工作。你是否申请了竞争过于激烈的行业的职位呢？你的简历上是否有什么东西让人反感？你是否获得了面试机会，而在这个阶段搞砸了？就业指导中心一定有人能够回答几个基本问题。找个靠谱的人看看你的简历。搞清楚问题出在哪。广泛撒网。试着投一些不一样的职位。最困难的事情是，尽量别太灰心。